Man Utd: ‘Broken’ summer signing deemed ‘vulnerable’ with opponent urged to ‘look for him’

As we’ve noted before, sportswriting tends to follow what you might call the Anna Karenina Principle. The good stuff—the stuff that makes year-end lists like Longreads’s and Richard Deitsch’s—is all, on a certain level, the same, similarly structured long profile after similarly structured long profile, all in one way or another tracing the actual workings that animate the world of superficial appearances. The worst is … not. Every truly bad article and every truly bad post is a unique, delicate flower, blossoming in this harsh world despite its lack of redeeming qualities. So please, read on and bask in the unrepeatable, indescribable, mind-numbing awfulness of 2015’s worst sportswriting. Liel Leibovitz, Tablet Magazine | [object Object] The premise of the piece is self…

Forcing rookies to dress in costume is an MLB tradition that's as childish as it is time-honored. A gloriously dumb reminder that most baseball players are manchildren, forever stuck in high school. We are too; it's a major reason baseball players are perhaps easier to connect with than athletes in any other sport. The hazing ritual is usually reserved for the day before the last road trip of the year. All the team's rookies are forced to dress up in either a coordinated theme or a mishmash of glam nightmares, and then go out and sign autographs. Some teams have gotten an early start, while others have yet to reveal their big plans. Here, a collection of 2011's most fashionable rookies. Above, the Rays were apparently let loose in a Halloween superstore with 100 buc…

data-mm-id=”_dyfofa4th”>Rice-to-Montana. Aikman-to-Irvin. Brady-to-heck, anyone. Jones-to-Tate? Obviously, it's very, very, very premature to start writing Daniel Jones' Hall-of-Fame speech, even if New York Giants fans have already inducted him into their personal Cantons. But it's clear that Jones is the future, especially now that the Giants are back at .500 and appear competitive after winning their past two games with him at the helm. After an excellent preseason and a show-stopping debut against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, one that concluded with Jones handling matters himself via a game-winning rushing touchdown, the New York tabloids (and a certain First Take host) did the unthinkable: admit they might've been wrong about the Duke draft pick that went too high…

data-mm-id=”_cay7cdf7s”>Duke was thoroughly dissected by a hungry North Carolina State team last night. It was the most lopsided loss by a ranked Blue Devils side to an unranked squad in Mike Krzyzewski's four decades at the helm. He was, quite understandably, displeased with it all. And it's fair to say he didn't show much passion for the traditional post-game handshake line, breezing past Wolfpack coach Kevin Keatts at top speed.NC STATE UPSETS DUKE ?THEY'RE STORMING THE COURT IN RALEIGH! pic.twitter.com/r94ibBFMLJ— ACC Network (@accnetwork) February 20, 2020This predictably spawned a bevy of tweets and blog posts criticizing the coaching legend, who does seem to have a habit of being very chatty when he wins and far less engaged when he loses. That's not e…

data-mm-id=”_j21hxf49n”>As countries around the world rush to contain the spread of the coronavirus, all patterns of society have seen disruption, including the sports world. The potential scale of the virus outbreak has led to cancellations, postponements, and matches played before empty crowds. Though the International Olympic Committee has stood firm on holding the 2020 Olympic Games as scheduled, not all event organizers have been as steadfast, and still others may be at risk.Possible effects on Euro 2020To celebrate the 60th anniversary of the UEFA European Championship, the 2020 edition will be held in 12 different countries across Europe. Unfortunately, with a superbug on the loose wreaking havoc on worldwide travel, UEFA could not have picked a worse year to host such a unique …

data-mm-id=”_muso2pm44″>The second contest in the National League Division Series between the Los Angeles Dodgers and San Diego Padres was one of the best baseball games played this season. LA's 6-5 win was a brilliant display of the game at its finest. The result gave the boys in blue a 2-0 lead in the series, but the winding road it took to get there cemented the Padres and Dodgers as Major League Baseball's sexiest rivalry. Sure, the Red Sox and Yankees have more history, as do the Cubs and Cardinals and countless other matchups. But the Dodgers and Padres are both among the most talented teams in the game, have World Series aspirations, are littered with individual superstars and, best of all, they really don't like each other. All the elements are there for a compet…

data-mm-id=”_ygok9wp31″>Skip Bayless and Shannon Sharpe have been having more serious conversations than they normally would over the past few weeks. That continued this morning as Bayless revealed some details of his childhood. He spoke of Katie Bell, a black woman who worked for his grandmother in Oklahoma, to whom the job of raising him fell. He spoke of how she became like a mother to him and the lessons she bestowed. .@RealSkipBayless recalls his experience being raised by a black woman while growing up in Oklahoma City:"Everything I learned about right and wrong, black and white, I learned from Katie Bell." pic.twitter.com/bnx2oxzXm9— UNDISPUTED (@undisputed) June 10, 2020Bayless recalled his trips to church, where he was the only white person, and the compassion he w…

data-mm-id=”_9d7mja0h5″>Nathan Peterman looks like he will make the Las Vegas Raiders' final roster. In fact, the Raiders went through the trouble of reworking Peterman's contract which you would think they wouldn't bother with if they were about to cut him.The Raiders and QB Nathan Peterman agreed on a reworked contract for one-year, $1M, which is guaranteed, per source. He was previously due $2.133M, but it was not guaranteed. The team continues to value him as a developmental QB prospect in a year where QB depth is important.— Field Yates (@FieldYates) September 4, 2020Yesterday we talked about how Josh Rosen might become Ryan Fitzpatrick. Who knows what Nathan Peterman might hope to become because he is three years older with a much worse track record. Despite the …

data-mm-id=”_welriewei”>There was a time – a simpler time – when Pabst Blue Ribbon was just a beer. That time was college and buddy, that was a long time ago. They say that necessity is the mother of invention and people need beer that isn't beer, so let me introduce you to Pabst Blue Ribbon Cannabis Infused Seltzer. No, that's not just a collection of words, it is a product available in select California dispensaries. It combines the Pabst brand with pot and also touches on the seltzer arms race currently taking place in the beer industry. In the words of an old friend, what a time to be alive. It features no alcohol which I guess means it is just fizzy pot pop with a hipster twist? And I say that with the utmost respect. I am lame enough to have once re-imagined the PBR lo…

data-mm-id=”_ya12s5ubv”>About one year ago, we were getting ready for the San Francisco 49ers to take on the Kansas City Chiefs in Super Bowl LIV. The Niners came up short and Patrick Mahomes won his first Super Bowl. But the future was bright in San Fran with Kyle Shanahan and a ferocious defense leading the way. One year later, things have changed. The Niners were snakebitten to the point it nearly defies belief in their attempt to defend their NFC title in 2020, losing quite literally every important player for at least multiple weeks due to injury. Jimmy Garoppolo missed almost the entire year along with George Kittle. Nick Bosa tore his ACL. The team finished 6-10 and last in the NFC West. No use crying over spilled milk. It's tough to swallow, but sometimes this just happens…